My last hour

I've spent the past hour (we'll call it my "lunch hour") doing two things. One was applying for a job with the Mets. Shit, if Pedro can get 4 years/$56 mil, I should at least be able to pull in a good $12-13 per hour....part time. I mean, I've worked in the Padres system and am 7 years younger. Unfortunately the online application would not allow my resume to be uploaded and with my ambition wilting with a tray of brownies waiting for me in the kitchen, I ended negotiations and called the deal off.

However, the other part of my lunch hour was spent assisting a female friend (shocking, I know) in her online shopping, essentially approving or disapproving of potential purchases. Now while it's possible that I started our conversation about those awesome tank top shirts girls wear that look like lingerie and perhaps tried to peer pressure her into buying some, we'll continue with the story as if I was innocently minding my business and had these pictures shoved at me for approval.

Although these shirts may be "out" as of now, especially in NYC, I will remind you that I am in upstate NY, where Zubaz pants are the hottest holiday gift. And if you are under the impression that I spend my day in too-small sweatpants from high school, you are correct, and may not believe that these pictures were found by somebody else, but I assure you they were. Like Moe from the Simpsons, I only look at the girls in the Sears catalog. Also, these pictures make my website sexy, and by default, me as well. Here are a couple of the possible purchases that were subject to my approval: