Wednesday, February 09, 2005

Natural Encounter

katie holmes, originally uploaded by blogjimmy.

Current Balance: $0.03
Available Balance: $0.03
Rate for messenger boy: $12/hour
Scheming to deliver goods to Katie Holmes at her apartment: Priceless

After a horrible day of roaming the streets of NYC delivering tickets for Fashion Week, I was finally rewarded with a special delivery. I was sent to deliver some duds from Vera Wang to Katie Holmes at her apartment. The people in charge strictly informed me that I was to leave the goods with her doorman and were not amused by my asking "Won't SHE want to meet me?". Unfortunately for them, there was a 0% chance I was leaving the gear with a doorman and not meet Katie Holmes. So I concocted a scheme to tell the doorman that she had to approve the clothes first before I left. I am smarter than anyone I know. Heart palpitating, I get by the doorman with relative ease and he points me to the elevator for her penthouse. Officially in, I get up to her apartment and ring her bell. There she was, in all of her natural glory to accept my delivery with a friendly hello and I answered with a hoarse, raspy "How are you?". If I recall incorrectly, she then asked me if I enjoyed chardonnay and soft music, to which I replied "Yes, and robes as well."

Although that last part only happened when I was sleeping, the rest of the story is true and she did give me a genuine smile and wishes for a great day. It should be noted for the record that Katie Holmes is Co's all time favorite Natural, even getting a #1 seed in Wass's old bracket if I remember correctly. I never gave her any credit due to her frankenstein eyes, but she was looking good today and will look good tonight again in my kleenex-filled dreams.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

What a great subject to do your homework to

10:06 PM  
Blogger farsename said...

You should have laid the charm on extra heavy and thick... that would have been amazing if an unemployed kid from the city hooked it up with a kind of well known celebrity. Maybe you could land one more delivery there and you could booze it up a bit and show up at her door with severe friendly eyes and you wont be so nervous.

7:42 PM  

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